wakeel: my lord kanoon

wakeel: my lord kanoon ki kitaab ke saffha number 15 ke mutabiq mere muakkal ko ba izzat-bari kia jaye.

JUDGE: kitaab paish ki jaye

(kitab pesh ki gaye)

judge ne saffa khola to us mei 5000, 5000 k do note thay..

JUDGE: is tarah k do saboot aur pesh kiye jayein. Read More!

Dohni

Dohni: maa muchy plate ma chahay (tea) kun day rahi ho.

Maa: Cup tumaray baap ko lay gayn hain. Read More!

1 pathan ny

1 pathan ny jalti hue building sy 6 logon ko nikala!but phir bhi logo ny usy boht mara
Q???





is liye k
us ny wo 6 log nikaly thy jo k aag bhuja rahy thy. Read More!

Rok Do Mere JanaZe Ko ZaLimo

Rok Do Mere JanaZe Ko ZaLimo,

Mjh Mein JaaN aa Gai Hai,

PeeChe Mur K Dekho KaMeeNo,


CiGrette Ki DuKaan aaGai Hai.... Read More!

Munna: Teray ko maaloom hai

Munna: Teray ko maaloom hai k cigarette aik tarah say slow poison ka kaam karta hai.
Patient: To mujhay konsa marnay ki jaldi hai. Read More!

Tuje pata hai smoking

Vani: Tuje pata hai smoking slow poison ka kaam karte hai.
Funy: To mujhay konsa marnay ki jaldi hai Read More!

When money talks

When money talks, the criminal walks. Read More!

No guts?

No guts, no glory, no brain, same story. Read More!

If you hate me

If you hate me, i love you too. It aint my fault im better than you Read More!

I"m @ the police station

I"m @ the police station now been done 4 drink driving.Urine

sample was positive so I nicked the sample.they r now doin

me 4 taking the piss Read More!

im at the police station

im at the police station.The police caught me & filed a case

against me "possession of good looks".i"m doomed! i need

someone ugly 2 bail me out-so hurry up! Read More!

i hereby place u under arrest

i hereby place u under arrest 4 violating code 0569 -

distracting public with ur xtreme good looks &sex

appeal.remain silent & report 2 my bedroom Read More!

My Nights r going SleepLess

My Nights r going SleepLess,
My Days r going UseLes,
I hv becom SpeachLess,
So,
I asked My Heart;
is it Love?
Heart replied

"Na Putr Paper a gaye ne.." Read More!

Har Sawal Se Dat Kar Ladna

Har Sawal Se Dat Kar Ladna,
Fekne Me Kami Mat Karna,
Mouka Mila To Peche Bhi Dekhna,
Aur Ek Baath Yaad Rakhna,
Aage Wala Ka Paper Apna Samajhna Read More!

Success is the derivative function of calculated efforts

Success is the derivative function of calculated efforts. So, Effort + Effort + Effort + ..... = Success... Success in your exams. Read More!

Apne Honton se kehdo

Apne Honton se keh do Yun na Muskuraya karen...


Hum bohat Gustaakh hain, Choom liya karte hain. Read More!

Golden Words

# Golden Words

Jo Pappi De
Us Se Le LO

Aur Jo Na De
Us Se Zabardasti Le LO


Dr.Emraan Hashmi. Read More!

Aankhain Thein Kahan

Aankhain Thein Kahan Itni Sharabi Pehle,
Chehra Tha Kahan Itna Kitabi Pehle,

Aaina To Zara Dekhiye Booso(Kiss) Ke Baad,
Kya Hont They Itne Hi Gulabi Pehle.! Read More!

Pura Truck Bhar k Aftaari

.–,!""""""""""""!
/ - ,! AFTAARI !
“-O-’"""‘"""O’O""



Pura Truck Bhar k Aftaari Bhej Raha hon.

Ab Kisi Masjid K Aagy Mat Bethna. ura Truck Bhar k Aftaari Read More!

Pathan ka Roza Na Tootay

Pathan: Molvi Sahab koi Aisa tareeqa batao k

Main Khaon Piyon, Aur Mera Roza na Tootay?

Molvi: Logon se Mukke aur Laaten Khao.

Aur Ghussa Piyo. Roza Nahi Tootyga. Read More!

Read its very fast

Read its very fast.
wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow
wow wow wow wow wow wow wow wow

CONGRATULATION! now you make a sweet puppi. Read More!

aj temprature 47 degree

aj temprature 47 degree ho ga ap apne dimagh wali jagah per baref rekh lain kiyonki bhoosa juldi aag pakerta hey. Read More!

Tery chehry pe udasi ankhoo ma nami hai

Tery chehry pe udasi ankhoo ma nami hai,
.
.
.
.
.
.
National namak istimaal kar tujhy iodeen ki kami hai=)) Read More!

Gul Ne Gulshan Se Gul Faam Bheja Hai

Gul Ne Gulshan Se Gul Faam Bheja Hai,
Sitaroon Ne Asmaan Se Salam Bheja Hai,

Mubarak Ho Aapko Ramadan Ka Mahina,
Ye Paigham Hamnain Sirf Apko Bheja Hai Read More!

Ramadan ka chand daikha

Ramadan ka chand daikha,
Rozay ki dua mangi,

Roshan sitara daikha,
Aap ki khairiat ki dua mangi,

May Almight Allah bless you with his
blessing in the holy month of Ramadan Read More!

May This Ramadan be as bright as ever

May This Ramadan be as bright as ever.
May this Ramadan bring joy, health and wealth to you.

May the festival of lights brighten up you
and your near and dear ones lives.

May this Ramadan bring in u the most
brightest and choicest happiness and
love you have ever Wished for.

May this Ramadan bring you the
utmost in peace and prosperity.

May lights triumph over darkness.

May peace transcend the earth.

May the spirit of light illuminate the world.

May the light that we celebrate at Ramadan
show us the way and lead us together on the
path of peace and social harmony

"Wish you a very happy Ramadan Mubarak" Read More!

Mujhe Bewakoof Bna Dya

Kuch is tarah Usne mujhe Bewakoof Bana Diya Faraz.....


.



.


.


Ji Haan! Bilkul Isi Tarah. :-) Read More!

Sharbat ka Glass

Faraz to Galib:
"Phool ko to khilna hai wo to khile ga,
Garmi bari hai ek glass Sharbat ka milega."

Galib:
"Alif se le kar ye tak k beech mai aata hai Sheen,
Abay itna Pyasa hai to laga le Ganney ki Machine." Read More!

Gol Matol Girlfriend

Boy to Girl: Tum to 14vee ka Chand ho.

Girl: Sach kya Main itni Khubsurat hon?

Boy: Arey nahi! Main to Ye batana chah raha tha Tum itni Gol Matol ho. :-) Read More!

Happy Moments

Happy Moments - PRAISE ALLAH
Happy Moments - PRAISE ALLAH
Difficult Moments- SEEK ALLAH
Quiet Moments - WORSHIP ALLAH
Painful Moments - TRUST ALLAH
Moment By Moment - THANK ALLAH Read More!

Life is Test,Islam is best

Life is Test,Islam is best,
Life is Test,Islam is best, Namaz is must,Aakhrut is for rest,World is only dust, If Quran is in chest,nothing need next, Obey ALLAH first. 1st success wil b next. Read More!

The beautiful word is ALLAH

The beautiful word is ALLAH,
The beautiful word is ALLAH,
Most beautiful song is AZAN,
Best exercise is NAMAZ,
World perfect book is QURAN,
And You are so lucky if YOU are a MUSALMAN. By UZZAL Read More!

Loads of good wishes for Raksha Bandhan

Sky is blue, feel this hue,
my love is for you Bhaiya…always true.
Loads of good wishes for Raksha Bandhan Read More!

As your Brother is always beside you

Hey Sis,
When the world goes dark,
Stars are there…
When the journey breaks up,
Hope is there…
When the entire world is vanished,
And you feel left alone…
Tilt your head and look beside you,
Will bring you comfort feeling of
Care and affection molds on you,
As your Brother is always beside you
To pour the special love and affection forever…

[ HAPPY RAKSHA BANDHAN ] Read More!

Tie rakhi on my wrist

I waited long for the day through the year
that you so ceremoniously tie rakhi
on my wrist and pray for my well being.
Dear Sis, I wish that our bond grows stronger everyday. Read More!

Oh my Dear, Forget ur Fear,

Oh my Dear, Forget ur Fear,
Let all ur Dreams be Clear,
Never put Tear, Please Hear,
I want to tell one thing in ur Ear
Wishing u a very “Happy NEW YEAR“! Read More!

We spend January 1

We spend January 1 walking through our lives, room-by-room, drawing up a list of work to be done, cracks to be patched. Maybe this year, to balance the list, we ought to walk through the rooms of our lives... not looking for flaws, but for potential. Read More!

A happy New Year

A happy New Year! Grant that I
May bring no tear to any eye
When this New Year in time shall end
Let it be said I've played the friend,
Have lived and loved and labored here,
And made of it a happy year. Read More!

Happy New Year 2010

((((`'·.¸(`'·.¸ ¸.·'´) ¸.·'´))))
«`'.¸.¤Happy New Year 2010.¸.'´»
((((¸.·'´(¸.·'´ `'·.¸)`' ·.¸)))) Read More!

The most happy marriage

The most happy marriage I can imagine to myself would be the union of a deaf man to a blind woman. -- S. T. Coleridge Read More!

Bet A Bar

Making a bet at a bar.

Two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on. It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal. "I'll bet you $10 he'll jump," said the first guy. "Bet you $10 he won't," said the second guy.

Then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge. The second guy hands the first guy the money.

"I can't take your money," said the first guy. "I cheated you. The same story was on the five o'clock news." "No, no. Take it," said the second guy. "I saw the five o'clock news too. I just didn't think the guy was dumb enough to jump again!" Read More!

Top 10 sardarji inventions

Top 10 sardarji inventions............

1) The water-proof towel

2) Solar powered torch

3) Submarine revolving door

4) A book on how to read

5) Inflatable dart board

6) A dictionary index

7) Ejector seat in a helicopter

8) Powdered water

9) Pedal-powered wheel chair

10) Water-proof tea bag Read More!

Main kisi aur ka hun,itna bta kr roya

Main kisi aur ka hun,itna bta kr roya.

Wo mujay mehndi lge hath dikha kr roya

Mjhe anjam.e.mhbt nahi maloom tha hrgiz

Ye kaha or mjhe seeney se laga kr roya

Jo mjy zbt ki talkeen kia krta tha

Wo zmanay ko mra haal suna k roya

Ansu bn kr nikal na jaon kahin is dar se

Apne ashkon ko wo ankhon mn chupa kr roya

Wasal ka akhri lamha jo mussar tha hmen

Usi lamhy mn wo sadion ko sama kr roya,,,,! Read More!

Chand adhura hai sitaro ke bina

Chand adhura hai sitaro ke bina,

gulshan adhura hai bahaaro ke bina,

samundar adhura hau kinaro ke bina,

jeena adhura hai tum jaise yaaro ke bina!!! Read More!

Kuch nasha to aapki baat ka hai

Kuch nasha to aapki baat ka hai
Kuch nasha to dheemi barsaat ka hai
Hame aap yuhi sharabi na kahiye,
Yeh dil par asar to aapse mulaqat ka hai. Read More!

Dil ne kaha chalo

Dil ne kaha chalo “SMS” karain, socha.!! “dil to pagal hai” phir khayal aaya chalo koi bat nahin jis ko karna hay woh konsa normal hay Read More!

Kaise meri jani howa karty they

Kaise meri jani howa karty they, Kaise mujh pe qurban howa karte they, Kaise badle ho aik hafte main tum, pichle hafte toh tum INSAN howa karty they!!! Read More!

Gabber abey ohh zerdari beynazeer

Gabber abey ohh zerdari beynazeer ki bersi main kitnay aadmi thay zerdari serdar pata nahi serdar main to Ortain ginti ker raha hai. Read More!

Pray to Allah Almighty

Pray to Allah Almighty,
And show some faith n dignity,
Quran be at your side,
Islam giving you a pride,
Sunnah be a light for you,
That will glow and let you do,
All the acts to make you feel,
Nothing but this land is real. Read More!

Then Join hands in Hands

Then Join hands in Hands, Brave Pakistani”s all!
By uniting we stand by dividing we fall, Jashne Azadi Mubarik.
Allah Bless our country. Read More!

Independence a Precious gift of God

Independence a Precious gift of God.
May We Always Remain Independent Amin.
A Very Happy Independence Day To You. Pakistan Zindaabad. Read More!

Recipe of Ramadan

RAMADAN RECIPE

A Glass of Care
A Plate of Luv
A Spoon of Peace
A Fork of Truth &
A Bowl of Duaas.

Mix with spices of QURAAN.
Enjoy This Meal.
RAMADAN MUBARAK Read More!

Wish u a very happy Ramadan Mubarak

May This Ramadan be as bright as ever.
May this Ramadan bring joy, health and wealth to you.

May the festival of lights brighten up you
and your near and dear ones lives.

May this Ramadan bring in u the most
brightest and choicest happiness and
love you have ever Wished for.

May this Ramadan bring you the
utmost in peace and prosperity.

May lights triumph over darkness.

May peace transcend the earth.

May the spirit of light illuminate the world.

May the light that we celebrate at Ramadan
show us the way and lead us together on the
path of peace and social harmony

“Wish you a very happy Ramadan Mubarak” Read More!

Titanic

If the Film "Titanic" was made in India

1) There would be 10 times as many people on the ship

2) There would be a song with Kate Winslet in a white saree and of course singing in the rain!

3) The movie would be called "Pyar Kiya To Marna Kya"

4) Hero and Heroine would float in cold water for days and still survive, but the villian would die in the first dip.

5) The iceberg would be sent by the heroine's father to teach the hero a lesson.


6) None of the women would float due to heavy designer sarees.

And last but not least

7) Half of the rescue boats would be reserve for SC/ST/OBC Read More!

Very sick Man

A man hasn't been feeling well, so he goes to the doctor to get a checkup. Afterward the doctor comes out with the results. "I'm afraid I have some very bad news," the doctor says. "You're dying, and you don't have much time left." "Oh, that's terrible!" says the man. "How long have I got?"

"Ten", the doctor says sadly.

"Ten?" the man asks. "Ten what? Months? Weeks? What?!"

"Nine...eight..." Read More!

What will happen if Brooke shield marries james bond?

Q. What will happen if Brooke shield marries james bond?

A. She will become BrookE BOND. Read More!

har aaib sahi

"""har aaib sahi
mujh main magar
aaj bhi mujh
ko"""

"""apnon se
khafa honey ka
andaaz nahi
aya....!!!!! Read More!

Karo gey Yaad Guzrey Zamaney ko..

Karo gey Yaad Guzrey Zamaney ko..

Tarso Gey Hamarey Sath 1 Pal bitaney ko,

Phir AwAz dogey humey vapis bulaney ko,

Or hum kahian gey..!! Darwaza nahin hai..!!
Kabar sey Bahir aney ko..!! Read More!

Janay konse nagar ki cheriaya

Janay konse nagar ki cheriaya

Shaam mundayer pay aa bhati hai

Choonch may aik nazuk si daali

Us per aik sunehra phool Read More!

Plz call me, its urgent

Plz call me,
its urgent.
Ek accident ho gaya hai.
.
.
.
.
.
Aap ka hi blood group chahiye,
Plz mana mat karna
.
.
Warna
.
.
GADHA mar jayega Read More!

When somebody who is deeply in love

When somebody who is deeply
in Love with you tells that
You are
cute, beautiful, & angelic,
I agree. That’s true,
Believe me,
I swear because love is definitely blind Read More!

Evil made a mother-in-law.

God thought that since
he couldn’t b everywhere
he made a mother.

Then devil thought that
he couldn’t be everywhere
he made a mother-in-law. Read More!

Passion running trough my veins

Passion running trough my veins, trembling, waiting, reason is fading. Overpowering desire sets my skin on fire! Read More!

Somewhere, someone dreams of your smile

Somewhere, someone dreams of your smile and finds your presence in life so worth while. So when you are lonely, remember it's true that someone, somewhere, is thinking of you. Read More!

Can you see me? no?

Can you see me? no? Turn around, can you see me now? no? Turn again, can you see me now? I can see you because you have a special place in my heart! Read More!

Butterflies don't know the color of their wings

Butterflies don't know the color of their wings, but human eyes know how nice it is. Like wise u don't know how good u are, but I know How Special U R... Read More!

Wish my eyes could speak

wish my eyes could speak what my heart feels for you,'coz my lips can lie, waht is tru.............my eyes cant....................coz even wen i close them.......... i see you...... Read More!

1. Measured by miles

1. Measured by miles,
U r far from me ....

Measures by thoughts
U r closer to me...

Measured by closed eyes
U r with me ....

Measured by heart
U r in me...... Read More!

Do u Know what is the Meaning of HAPPY..?

Do u Know what is the Meaning of HAPPY..?


H-hum
A-aap ko
P-pal
P-pal
Y-yaad karte hai Read More!

Your words of love steal

Your words of love steal
someone's heart,
but you don't know that your
heart is already stolen by me,
check it! Read More!

Good time

Good time,
bad time,
night time,
day time,
work time,
off time,
sad time,
happy time,
in the mean time i'm thinking of you all the time. Read More!

Freedom in the Mind

Freedom in the Mind,
Faith in the words..
Pride in our Souls..
Lets salute the Nation on 61th Independence Day!
Happy 14th August Read More!

Its too hard to loose someone

Its too heard to loose someone who is 99% cute, 98% sweet, 97% loving, 96% talented and 100% friendly, Thats me, whats a waste of life if u loose me. Read More!

I m getting married next month.

I m getting married next month.... its small party and only few people will be invited...... dont bring any gift.....just bring someone who ll marry me. Read More!

Nobody is like you

Nobody is like u, nobody cares 4 u, nobody misses u, nobody wants to see u good, nobody is ur best fr, nobody is happy with u.... dont cry.......my name is nobody Read More!

May the beauty of deewali

May the beauty
Of deepavali season
Fill your home with
Happiness,
And may the coming year
Provide you with all
That bring you joy! Read More!

May the divine light of diwali

May the divine light of diwali
spread into your Life
peace, prosperity, happiness
and good health. Read More!

For this, is a special time when family

For this, is a special time when family
And friends get together,for fun.
Wishing laughter and fun to cheer your days,
In this festive season of diwali and always!!!!!!!!
“Happy Deepavali” Read More!

This SMS will EXPLODE in 5 seconds….

This SMS will EXPLODE in 5 seconds….

:05

:04

:03

:02

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(((((BOOM)))))

“*”*”*”*”*”*”
*”*”HAPPY”*”*
“*”DIPAWALI”*”
….*”*”*…. Read More!

Reason for everything

There is always a reason 4 everything
A reason 2 live
A reason 2 die
A reason 2 cry,
But if u can’t find a reason to smile
Can I be the reason 4 a while:) Read More!

Real eyes to realise

GOD has given us
“REAL EYES” to
.
.
.
“REALISE” the
“REAL LIES”
.
.
.
Think twice and act wise. Read More!

U cant change the future

Marco Polo said:

“U can not
change ur
future….

but u can

change ur habits….
and
surely ur habits will
change
ur future” Read More!